My world is shattered after planning a baby
I honestly thought everything would be okay planning a baby at age 41 and diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. I called the prayer line. I prayed with my husband I started a Prayer journal for the baby. I guess you can say I was hoping for a miracle and I believed all things were possible with God. My psychiatrist tried to slowly get me off the medication and previously I had lost 22 lbs on a healthy vegan diet, my labs were finally good. I started pregnancy yoga and I wasn’t even pregnant I wanted a stress free environment for the baby. I practiced Bible verse meditation for a healthy pregnancy and I felt happy and glowing but then one month later after my medications were reduced to almost nothing came the crash, psychosis, irritability, anger outbursts, mood swings, depression, suicidal ideation, and self-harm behavior. My husband and I were constantly fighting and I knew that was no way to raise a child and I had to face the reality, I had to get back on the medication and...