Mental Health Inspiration

My mom always told me that she suff ered more than I did because I’m her child, and it hurt her to see me suff er. I always wondered how she could say that. She wasn’t the one locked up in mental hospitals on birthdays and holidays, or the one who felt life was so horrible that death seemed like the only solution. You were not the victim—I was. What I didn’t know was that when a family member has a mental illness, everyone was the victim. But, over the years, I became a survivor and was no longer a victim. I transformed my “woe is me” perspective and triumphed over my mental illness. I said good-bye to being isolated and withdrawn and feeling sorry for myself. I became resilient and strong. Victims can grow as people through obstacles and learn from life experiences. Th ey can see painful moments as opportunities to grow and shine, and they can love life as much as I do now. First, victims need to seek help. Victims can embrace the beauty of life. I believe even painful moments in our...

February 13, 2009 My soul was bleeding so much that night, and in a moment of weakness, I gave up. I just kept taking pills until all the bottles were empty. My suicide note was recorded on video on my web camera. Caylee’s cruel words rang loudly in my head, terrorizing me, haunting me. You want to kill yourself? Kill yourself! All you want is attention! Pua texted me Ecclesiastes 3, but not even the biblical verse that once saved my life was enough to stop me. I turned off  my cell phone and hid it. I didn’t want to be tempted to call 911. My friend and roommate, Yvonne, was out having fun. When she came home, she didn’t realize what I had done. She found me on the bed, my body stiff . I couldn’t speak. I was in and out of consciousness. I remember some of what happened, but not all of it. I tried to suff ocate myself with the pillow. Yvonne grabbed it off  my face. I remember hearing her snoring loudly at the edge of the bed and feeling excruciating pain all over my body bef...

Psychosis is a 6 th Sense: Embrace it! 6-15-15 My mentor, Dr.Zamora, once told me that psychosis may be a 6 th sense. I’ve always considered Dr. Zamora brilliant as a psychologist . The thought of it made me ponder until I realized that it is absolutely true. Once time I told a friend that I thank God for blessing me with a mental illness because it made me stronger. He thanked me for helping him see the positive things about having a mental illness. He said he is thankful for schizophrenia because through his mental illness he can talk to his deceased parents. His deceased parents convinced him not to jump off a train. He walked with his deceased parents on the railroad tracks.                Think about it. It can be pretty cool. You step into another realm, another world far from sanity. But really you see things other people don’t see. You can talk to dead people. I embrace my psychosis. The positiv...

Happily Ever After Comes From Me   March 12, 2014 I watched Bridget Jones Diary every weekend eight years. Joel would say, “Why are you always watching that movie about that crazy white girl?” “She’s not a white girl!” She is British and that’s the story of my life. My Greatest fear was that I would “die fat and a lone half eaten by wild dogs.” I guess single women love that movie because it gives us hope that there are some good men out there. So here is the situation, I’m going to be 34 years old on April 20, 2014 and I’m still single. I thought I met my prince charming. I always think I met my prince charming. I’m in love with being in love.             However, I have learned that I don’t need a prince to come carry me in a world of happily ever after. I always said to myself, who will love me? Will anyone ever love me enough to stay? They all break my heart but you know what? I love myself. I love myself so...